Happily Unmarried

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Tales from two cities

Blog lethargy has crept in, I think. But here’s an update on my life post the Bangalore trip. Bangalore was… well, nice in a way home is. Family, friends, home food. And the weather was lovely; with a nip in the air and some rain. But what’s with the roads, rather what’s left of them? And the traffic? And the auto drivers who want to charge you a “one and half” fare at 9.30 in the morning? And M G Road where it takes you half hour to find a ric to Infantry Road, which is 10 minutes away. Like I keep saying, there seems to be some sort of method in the Bombay madness, at least. But Bangalore seems like a city that has just gone mad and doesn’t know what to do with itself after the IT hurricane swept in. But then, what can I say? Its home and Bangalore I grew up together. And then, may be grew apart.

Not very long ago, I was fervently in love with the city. I still love it; but in an unromantic, asexual way, if I may say that. A lot of people, including my mother, DK and my friends back in Blore think I am just a small town girl smitten by the big city lights of Bombay. And that the novelty will fade sooner than later and then I will see Bombay for what it really is – dirty, cramped, harsh and unfit for a quality life. May be I will, may be I won’t.

It’s not as though I have shifted loyalties; but after having lived Bangalore at a time when Delhi and Bombayites were just about beginning to jealously eye it, I refuse to get used to what’s become of it now. I was so passionate about Bangalore once that I used to sound almost parochial and swear that I wouldn’t move away for anything in the world. But for now, I’d rather live in the sqalour of Bombay and visit Blore only when homesickness strikes. I don’t think I’ll be making peace with my hometown anytime soon.

The highlight of last week was my infamous fall outside office and the ensuing hand-in-a-sling, which drew more jabs and less sympathy from pretty much everyone. “Oh she slipped over that tiny slope outside work and now there’s a crater there.” “And just who were you gawking at?” “Now that the right hand is in a sling, are you adept at using your left index finger?” Suchlike. With friends like this, who needs therapists? And like she always does, I has provided adequate details about my injury, where I got treated et al. So no more about this.

And the next big thing was I’s long-pending visit. She’s right in a way; it’s just another city. But I guess, others don’t fall in love with Bombay as dramatically as I did. But then, that’s just me. With a special talent for falling in love hard and fast with the places, people and things that people saner will keep at double arm distance. Anyway, on her first night here, I left her alone with DK and disappeared to Leopold to be with Mr. Big after some seven weeks. When I left to see him, I was furious and disgusted that I was still hung up on him. And when I got back, all I could remember is his tired, tired face. He looked old, exhausted and past caring.

And for all my righteous anger, at that point, I couldn’t up muster anything more than sympathy, the last thing I would want to feel. So when I told Mads that, she said I must be getting over him at last; sympathy being a good indicator. I think so too, at times. But then, like Vinati says, some people are like viruses and bacteria. Some go away with time and some stay under your skin for life. All you can do is take necessary precautions to keep them at bay. And again, as Vinati brilliantly put it, think of him as a cold sore. There, but latent. And even people with herpes have a near normal life while the virus stays dormant. So, then.

Somehow, it struck me last night that suddenly, that the lives of nearly all my friends, all the people I keep in my prayers, are changing. Dramatically in some cases. Aravind got his divorce after five distressing years and has now moved abroad. Aman has signed a book deal and found a new love after some six years in an unpleasant marriage. Mads has found her peace and her freedom after an eight-year-long marriage that never really took off and soul-breaking relationships that had become a vicious circle. Dseq is going away to China, a vision that he has held on to every single day for the past five years. Shweta and Harish had a child after two plus years of marriage. Oinks found a lovely house that she so badly wanted after living in a 200 sq ft studio apartment for three years. G’s IT business seems to be getting off the ground after years and he’s seriously beginning to consider marriage. I is seriously contemplating moving to Bombay after living in Blore for 26 years. JJ went back to and proposed to Nawaz after three years. Mahesh made official his three year long relationship with Sanju…

And for my part, I’ve found the best job I’ve ever held, made mom proud and am actually beginning to crawl out of my financial mess of the past one year. And on the brink of my 27th birthday, it almost feels like the beginning of the end of the three-year-long obsession with Big. Someone up there is finally processing my applications and that of my friends too. Amen to that.

Ps. Like I has written, one is the proud owner of a very neat cupboard that one acquired in Oshiwara last Saturday. And it occurred to me, in all horror, that besides my clothes, accessories and books, it’s my only sizeable material possession in the whole while world while I owns a f***ing apartment with a view in Blore.

- H


  • Dear T2,

    As in Goofball language. twas nice and good.


    By Blogger JJ, at 1:35 AM  

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